The Restorative Power of Recalling Who We Really Are

This weekend I attended my first overnight mindfulness meditation retreat and learned about some wonderful ways in which early Buddhist teachings overlap with restorative practices.

For instance I learned from our teacher  (Santikaro of Liberation Park, WI) that the original word currently translated as “mindfulness” has two root meanings:

the more commonly understood Western concept of “being fully attentive to what is” and

the less well known concept of “recalling to mind”

What is it, exactly, that we are recalling?

Among other things, we are recalling – or bringing to mind – the “heart virtues” that already live within us, including Compassion, Forgiveness, Loving Kindness, and Appreciation.

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Seeking Similarities Over Differences

In highly individualistic cultures, like the United States, individuals are taught to laud their distinctions. Indeed, all too often the first question out of our mouths at a party – or even a coffee shop – is, “What do you do?”

From our earliest days in school, all the way through college and on to retirement, we are essentially taught to be competitive and how to position ourselves to succeed. We work hard on trying to craft that thing – you know the one – that makes us who we are. The one that makes us unique.

The one that makes us special.

We are also taught how to make distinctions. Within the first 15 seconds of meeting someone we’ve automatically got them sorted, usually on the basis of characteristics over which they have no control – not the least of which are height, sex, race, and age.

I’ll be the first to admit that I do this all the time. In fact, our ability to do this, and to do it quickly, is perhaps the most important cognitive survival mechanism we have. Can you imagine how overwhelming the social world would be if we couldn’t do this?


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Sex after 50? After 75? But of course !

Life without sex might be safer but it would be unbearably dull. It is the sex instinct which makes women seem beautiful, which they are once in a blue moon, and men seem wise and brave, which they never are at all. Throttle it, denaturalize it, take it away, and human existence would be reduced to the prosaic, laborious, boresome, imbecile level of life in an anthill. - H.L. Mencken

It is one of life's little ironies that the idea of our parents having sex makes us cringe, given that most of us owe our existence to their having done so.

And the thought of grandparents getting it on?

Even creepier.


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Loving Touch Is Key to Healthy Brain Development

Credit:Psychology Today

A study released on October 8, 2013 confirms the importance of human touch to healthy brain development. Researchers in the UK found that loving touch, characterized by a slow caress or gentle stroking increases the brain's ability to construct a sense of body ownership and plays a big part in creating and sustaining a healthy sense of self.

Much like the instinct to lovingly pet an animal, gently touching another person is a reflexive gesture that happens automatically in healthy, loving relationships between a parent and a child, romantic partners, and affectionate close friends. We all know from first hand experience that being touched makes us feel safe and comfortable in our environment

The findings of this new study titled, "Bodily Pleasure Matters: Velocity of Touch Modulates Body Ownership During the Rubber Hand Illusion” were published online in Frontiers of Psychology. The research was led by Neuropsychoanalysis Centre Director Dr. Aikaterini (Katerina) Fotopoulou from University College London, and Dr. Paul Mark Jenkinson of the Department of Psychology, University of Hertfordshire in the UK.

Read full article Psychology Today