Finding the Possible in Impossible Relationships

The older I get the more I realize the most enduring moments are the ones in which we try to connect with others—like Amy and her mom—no matter how problematic such an endeavor may seem.

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Victoria Ehmen MA LMFT is a certified Sex Therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist in Volusia County for 22 years . (386) 253-2531

Think You're Thinking? 6 Reasons to Think Again

Why your mind isn't the steel trap you think it is-The upside to researching is that you’re always learning something new. The downside is that, sometimes, you have to trash some of your most treasured beliefs and illusions. Both happened during the course of writing my new book, Mastering the Art of Quitting. My image of myself as a reasoning person, attentive to detail and sentient, and a thriving realist took a beating from which I’ve yet to recover.

Read full article in Psychology Today

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Victoria Ehmen MA LMFT is a certified Sex Therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist in Volusia County for 22 years . (386) 253-2531

9 Types Of Sex To Reignite The Spark In Your Marriage

Love and sex are like the roots that feed the tree. To keep that vital energy going, and the sap rising, you need to provide something new and interesting. Seduction can be as simple as causing your partner to ask what you've been doing that has you so energized and interested. When you're enthusiastic, you're seductive -- it's the most attractive we can be.

The Huffington Post posted this article on nine types of sex to reignite the spark in your marriage! 

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Victoria Ehmen MA LMFT is a certified Sex Therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist in Volusia County for 22 years . (386) 253-2531

How to Spot and Deal with Passive-Aggressive People

"Behind the smile, a hidden knife!"  

― Ancient Chinese saying describing passive-aggressive behavior

The NYU Medical Center defines a passive-aggressive individual as someone who "may appear to comply or act appropriately, but actually behaves negatively and passively resists." Passive- aggressive actions can range from the relatively mild, such as making excuses for not getting together, to the very serious, such as sabotaging someone’s well-being and success.

Most chronically passive-aggressive individuals have four common characteristics: They’re unreasonable to deal with, they’re uncomfortable to experience, they rarely express their hostility directly, and they repeat their subterfuge behavior over time. Passive aggressiveness may be directed towards a person or a group.

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Victoria Ehmen MA LMFT is a certified Sex Therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist in Volusia County for 22 years . (386) 253-2531

Five Transformational Family Resolutions for the New Year

As the New Year dawns, we humans have a longing to recommit, to make aspirational promises and pledges. “I will eat healthier.” “I will be in touch with old friends.” “I will exercise.” These are all so good! But we tend to plan and do these things from the perspective of ourselves as individuals. This season, let’s make our individual recommitments but this year, let’s also recommit as families and communities too.

Let’s make resolutions that will inspire and activate all the best parts of how we come together in our core circles of humanity. Let’s plan how we will best take care of each other this year. How we can best count on each other. Instead of rushing to buy that one last gift, or to spend more money, we can create a model over the holiday season that inspires us going forward together into 2014. Spending time together. Laughing together. Loving each other. Taking time to really see each other. With this inspiration from this season, 2014 can become our strongest year ever.

Read more from Psychology Today
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Victoria Ehmen MA LMFT is a certified Sex Therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist in Volusia County for 22 years . (386) 253-2531

Tips for Surviving the Holidays

As many of us head home on the busiest travel day of the year, we can look forward to relaxation, time with family, good food and good presents. But many of us may also be anxiously anticipating terrible traffic, long travels, time with family, guilt-inducing meals, and awkward gift exchanges. So just like last year, I've compiled a few scientifically-based tips to help make your holidays a little brighter.

Here is how (Source: Psychology Today)
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Victoria Ehmen MA LMFT is a certified Sex Therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist in Volusia County for 22 years . (386) 253-2531

How Workaholics Can Relax Right During the Holidays

So the holidays have arrived and that detested stretch of time when nothing much happens—a few days before Christmas till a few days after New Year’s is here. The workaholic in you hates it; the long void between the Yuletide and early January makes you feel anxious and powerless. Your nerves jangle and you feel guilty. Irritation and a maybe some depression set in as your frustration mounts.

Let’s face it: Workaholics don’t do vacation well. Especially enforced vacations like the one currently underway, presents and parties be damned.

So what can you do? Read more from Psychology Today

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Victoria Ehmen MA LMFT is a certified Sex Therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist in Volusia County for 22 years . (386) 253-2531